My Day Off Work

My mammogram was scheduled for 10:30, and my ultrasound was for 11:30, so I took the whole day off. I also had a Spanish test that night so I didn’t think I wanted to drive back and forth for two hours of work in the afternoon.

I showed up early, and they actually pulled me in for the mammogram early. The tech was very nice. We talked about my symptoms and then she started the squish.

Last time (the only time) I had a mammogram it was not that bad (about 1.5 years ago.) This time was much worse, maybe because they were aiming at a spot on top of my breast.

She took a picture, then moved me, and said “this might hurt more than the last one.” Okay, yes, it did. Then… then she moved me around, said merely “I’m sorry” and pushed a button. I said “…OW…” She told me she says she’s sorry all day long.

So then she said I could get dressed, and either sit in the regular lobby, or right outside in the hall, to wait for my ultrasound. I chose the hall and pulled out my Spanish notes. It was still about 45 minutes till my next appointment. I sat there and smiled unnaturally at everyone who went by, except for the men in hospital gowns who I avoided looking at. Several of the staff stopped by several times to make sure no one had forgotten me. They checked to make sure my paperwork was where it should be with a note saying where I was.

I didn’t know who I was waiting for exactly, just the ultrasound tech. There were lots of people going in and out of rooms. I saw the lady who turned out to be the ultrasound tech go in and out, and go get someone, and disappear back into a room for what seemed like a long time. It got to be about 15 minutes past my appointment time. The staff all seemed to think this was abnormal but I said I had the whole day off, and I smiled.

Finally I got one of the staff to cover for me while I went to the bathroom. When I came out she said “sure enough while you were in there…” but the tech said “no actually I’m not ready yet, I still have a patient and she hasn’t come back yet” (from where, I never found out.)

The other patient came back, the tech basically just told her she could go, and the tech went in the room. I waited outside politely to be invited in.

Time passed.

I glanced into the room sideways from where I sat, and noticed I could see a curly phone cord coming out from the wall. I listened carefully and realized the tech was on the phone. After a while I heard “I guess I’m just angry because…” and I didn’t get the rest. I thought oh Hell my tech is angry. At least it wasn’t the mammogram tech.

But when she finally called me in the first thing she said was “thank you for being so sweet” and she told me the patient before me had numerous problems and now she was an hour behind, and she never runs behind. She was very nice. We joked about the bead that the mammogram tech left on my breast to mark the spot, as she tried to scrape it off. It took a few tries.

After she started the ultrasound she didn’t say a word, and her face was very serious.

When she finished, she made it sound like she was going to show something to the doctor and then come back and tell me to leave. But she came back with a lady doctor that I don’t know.

This is where I have to remember, I already knew I had a ginormous lump when I went in there. They just saw it. They are now as worried as I already was, when I got there, which just totally freaks me out. Of course I don’t express this hardly at all.

The doctor told me she was going to call my doctor, and that he would probably tell me to schedule a follow up with the biopsy surgeon. But I already had one of those and I told them. She said she’d call my doctor anyway. I asked if I should call him later, she said yes, I neglected to do it.

Then of course today he called me and bumped up my appointment to tomorrow, which sent my blood pressure through the roof for about three hours. But I’m still trying to hope that it’s a cyst and the biopsy will drain it and it will be fixed.