“How I need that music to fill me”
“How I need to believe I’m doin’ the best that I can”
Meeting my family was wonderful. We took over a table for 12, in our friend’s favorite local hangout, for two hours and everyone smiled the whole time. Then we went back to my friend’s with my sis and bro that came 2.5 hours for this. They asked to pray for me. What are ya gonna say? No? So…. they “laid hands on me” and did the praise Jesus for a full five minutes. I did not close my eyes. I just tried to memorize their faces.
The music camping festival was fantastic. My favorite band was there. They played early, and I thought the rest was all icing on the cake. Since I just know we are going every year no matter what, I had not fully investigated Sunday’s program and I had to pull out a third day’s worth of dancing for 7 hours. There were some amazing, and also famous, people in a band I never heard of. And *they* could see us better than we could see them. It was a total turn on to dance in that situation.
Then on Monday, no music, and we had to travel so I got craaaaaaanky and bickered with our friend. But we did get to have dinner with some folks I truly love. The lady told me I was awesome just cause I’ve not laid down and given up or something. Well… maybe going camping between chemos is a bit unusual.
Tuesday was fly day. I’ve had a cold for three weeks and by then I was feeling a bit run down.
Wednesday I had four different medical scans, including one contrast dye injection. I feel like the dye sent me over… by evening I had a fever of 100.1. I stayed home from work Thursday. Friday I had *another* contrast dye test and didn’t go to work after.
The fever was over by Saturday but I’m mostly just laying around and playing guitar.
I hope you’re taking it easy. That line about camping between chemo sessions was great:)
And prayer is never, ever a bad idea. I need to remember to use it more often, not just in the instances when a family member is driving on the road somewhere & I’m nervous about their safety – lol. God has got to completely be laughing at my idiocy.
Hope you’re feeling better by now . . . xo
I’ve accepted offers of prayers from Baptist, Catholic, Mormon, Holy Roller, and a sweet young lady from my Child Development Class who is whatever that Islam thing is (score!).
She happened to have a comic book about her religion that day, to show to the teacher, which I peeked at over her shoulder. It looked like a nice and interesting comic book. But it was the last day of classes, so I didn’t see her again.
She only said she would pray for me… or maybe she suggested that I should pray. I smiled and said “thank you.”
Personally I’m an agnostic except when I’m an athiest. Or when I start talking to that guy from my born again days and saying “If you’re out there after all, against all sense, logic, and odds, then you KNOW WHY I FEEL THIS WAY” and then I just feel lonely. And then I’m an athiest again for a while. And then I realize it’s not that black and white. Like most things. I forget that a lot.