about my cancer – updated 2/21/09

What I have:
Her2+ breast cancer. At diagnosis, the tumor was 8 cm.
Some lymph node involvement. A less than 1 cm “suspicious” spot that might indicate spread to the liver.

I refused a biopsy on a small spot on my liver, that would have been inconclusive if it came back negative, and might have caused my lung to collapse. I decided to assume the spot is cancer and then proceed as if it is not. I’m not ready to be declared “incurable”. However, it’s possible I’m stage IV.

Results of August Scans

My scans were clean, no more suspicious spots outside the breast, and the lymph nodes seem clear. I still might not get to keep them though.The 8cm tumor has shrunk into three 2 or 3 cm pea shaped things with some space between.

I talked to my real oncologist, when she came back from vacation, in September. Apparently there were two spots on the liver (I thought it was only one.)  One went away and one didn’t, so the doctor says maybe it was not even cancer in the first place. She said “we might be going for a cure, here.”

Results of November Scans
The breast MRI and the PET scan showed no signs of cancer. The lymph nodes are clear and I get to keep them.

Treatment plan:
Finished: A/C chemotherapy every 21 days, 4 times, started May 2008.
Finished: Taxol/Herceptin chemotherapy every week, 12 times, started August 2008
Herceptin every 21 days until about August 2009
Surgery in December – mastectomy on the right side only
Radiation every damn weekday from the last week in January, through mid march.

Surgery was delayed because of the size of the tumor. They wanted to shrink it first. This worked. After the first chemo the tumor was noticeably smaller, and after the second it was hard to find. Now it is undetectable by MRI.

They found “no detectable cancer” in the breast tissue removed. They found some “precancerous” stuff. The oncologist stressed that she would be paying more attention to my liver than she “normally” would, so I’ll be having plenty more scans.

How I found it:
I found it by accident, in March 2008. My hand happened to fall on the lump and I noticed it. I had to wait three weeks for a mammogram but then everything went much more quickly. The surgeon who did the biopsy, and who will do the surgery later, told me after just feeling it, that she was pretty sure it was cancer.

I had a mammogram (my first ever, and my first doctor’s appointment in several years) a year and a half before I found the lump. I had been putting off the next one because my community college classes were all I could think about. I am in my late 40s.

What I have to say about Breast Self Exams:
I’ve seen the news stories about the value of these. My take is: the procedure given out is too complicated and daunting. (That’s not my personal excuse though: I was lazy and negligent and forgetful.)

I think if I’d been paying any attention at all, I would have noticed this sooner. (On the other hand, mine seemed to be growing scary fast, after I found it, so who knows how much sooner.)

I say: get familiar with your breasts, so you will know if anything changes. Feel yourself up often. Don’t worry if you follow the procedure to the letter.

As to being scared of finding something: Believe me, it’s much scarier to find it when you can’t ignore it anymore.